The Night Before Compliance

As this year draws to a close, it is our hope that everyone has a safe, peaceful, and happy holiday season. For your holiday pleasure, we give you the following poem, written by SCM’s President, Paul Gantt, more than 30 years ago.

 

‘Twas the night before compliance when all through the plant

Production was stirring like a wild red ant.

 

The respirators were hung by the exit with care,

In hopes that no one would breathe bad air.

Safety managers hassled with issues of all kinds,

While visions of fines danced through their minds.

 

And with the SDSs and IIPPs on the shelf,

All there to protect our employee’s health,

When out in the shop it sounded like a bomb!

I sprang from my chair with ear protection on.

 

Once out of my room, I smelled ammonia so clear,

I donned my mask and rain in with fear.

A cloud was forming with such a bright sheen,

A false alarm, it was Fred our janitor, with Mr. Clean.

 

But what do we do with all our gases?

Outside agencies work as slow as molasses.

Of hazardous waste we are always concerned.

Do we place it in the corner, and have it burned?

So many things that could go wrong.

We can’t comply with a dance and a song.

 

Back at my desk, the telephone rang.

The receptionist said it was the SCM gang.

A full-service agency I found out they were,

Training, consulting, and documentation for sure.

 

They walked through the plant and developed a list

Of many an item I sure would have missed.

The requirements complex, the regulations unclear,

But with SCM on our side, there’s no room for fear.

 

They were calm, professional, and even quite funny,

I couldn’t believe it I got all this service for the money.

The programs they wrote were so practically applied,

It’s obvious they had our best interest in mind.

 

Their training was customized and took a new meaning.

Look at our employees just sitting there gleaming.

Our questions were answered on all that we did,

The experience they brought was simply splendid.

 

Away OSHA, EPA, and agencies alike,

On production, on profits, our sales take a hike.

Our worker’s comp rates just dropped in a flurry.

Now we don’t have to spend cash in such a hurry.

 

They sprang to our needs with such gallant force,

I wasn’t worried but of management, of course.

The CEO is happy, with such a safe place.

Now with our record, OSHA hasn’t a case.

 

Professionals I can rely on for all our needs.

They should get medals for all their good deeds.

But I heard them exclaim, as their handshake drew near,

“Happy Holidays to all, and to all a safe and healthy New Year!”

 

Please note that, in celebration of the holidays, we are giving our hard-working safety tip staff a few weeks of well-deserved rest. Our next safety tip will be out on Monday, January 6, 2025.

Happy Holidays!